nancy's blog

Are You Making Your Joy a Priority?

Your Joy a PriorityIt took working the steps in both my books Jump … And Your Life Will Appear and WORTHY: Boost Your Self-Worth to Grow Your Net Worth (Hay House, August 2016) to get in touch with what I wanted—just for me.

Even once I connected with my desires, they seemed crazy and selfish at first. I thought they were over the top and even “a waste of money” in some cases. But slowly, I expanded what I thought was possible for me and allowed myself to have more of what I desired. I started to see that some of my desires weren’t so crazy after all—I just had to take my blinders off. Then, I could give myself permission to want beyond what I thought was possible.

The process culminated in me hiring a woman to come to my home in Boulder once a week and cook healthy food for me. At the time I was traveling a lot and was tired of getting home to an empty kitchen after a long trip. I had stood in the middle of the aisle at the grocery store too overwhelmed to put anything in my cart too many times. I remember wishing I could just take a pill for each meal containing all the nutrients I needed so I didn’t have to deal with food. I hated to cook, so I’d either grab something quick to eat…or just not eat at all. Having this wonderful personal chef fill my fridge during that time was a fabulous convenience when I was tired from traveling. The food she made was ready for me to heat and serve. I loved it, and I felt loved.

I also discovered that it didn’t cost much more than going to the grocery store and buying food to make myself. Why did it feel like such an extravagance? Just because of my mindset. The idea of having a personal chef always seemed like something only the very wealthy would do. But my mindset had nothing to do with reality. Not only was a chef within the realm of possibility, but within the realm of practicality and reason. Still, it took some work to get to a place where I believed I was worthy of paying someone to cook for me, as opposed to simply opening a can of soup.

Once I stopped traveling as much for my job, I had more time to cook for myself and actually began finding some joy in it. So I decided not to have a professional cook anymore. But I will hire one again in a heartbeat when I feel like it! Because I’ve expanded what I think I’m worthy of having, I no longer consider a personal chef to be such an extravagant expense.

That experience made me realize that pieces of my “desired life” are attainable much sooner than I thought they’d be. I’m living proof that you can absolutely increase what you believe is possible for you to have!

Many of us make the mistake of thinking about our personal goals or hobbies as optional — things we do only if there is time left over.

What if you knew that engaging in the activities that support you feeling like the most energized and alive version of yourself, the more productive you will be in all other areas of your life?

Grab my FREE 10 Steps to Letting Go and Leaping, and Step One Jump! Audio to begin taking the steps toward becoming the best you that you can be. Click here!


Transformation in Thailand: Part 1



I’m 10 days into being home alone. I’ve been damn near hermetic actually, going out only for hikes and groceries, engaging with clients, friends and family over the phone only, and seeing no one. My definition of heaven. I’ve relished every moment to myself of working, writing, binge-watching and even cooking. Only 4 more left to go before I hit the road for a few days with my family in NYC where I also have few gigs – including my longest keynote speech ever at Hay House’s I Can Do It conference – and then a long-ass overseas flight to meet up with my man in Chiang Mai, Thailand.

That last part, about Thailand, is something I never expected to come out of my mouth. But wait. There’s more. Not only will I be there for 3 weeks, but just 3 days after I arrive we are off to Wat Ram Poeng, The Northern Insight Meditation Center, for a 10-day Silent Vipassana Meditation Retreat. Yes, you read that right. I’m going to spend 10 days in a monastery, sleeping in a room of my own, waking before 4am to practice sitting and walking meditation until retiring at 10pm. If I squint my eyes and strain my ears, it looks and sounds a lot like my current home-alone time – minus the binge-watching, of course. Or the talking. And someone will be cooking for me although there are only two meals offered each day, the first at 6am and the next at 10:30am. I honestly don’t even know what to think about that.

A few weeks ago, I noticed that if I started to allow myself to fully grasp the details of this adventure, I found myself in deep resistance. And fear. Do I even need to tell you how far out of my comfort zone I am going? For my honey, it’s no big deal. He’s been living in Aspen for 20+ years and, as is the culture in resort towns, he works seasonally. So, he hits it hard here in the winter and summer, and then gets out into the world for a couple months at a time in spring and fall. Over the years he’s travelled extensively in India, Nepal, Indonesia, and has done several 10-day Silent Vipassana Meditation Retreats – plus a 35-day!!! – at the very monastery we’re going to in Chiang Mai.

Me, not so much. But, this past spring we did spend 6 weeks living in Moab, UT which was a start! Thankfully, my work is mobile making it possible for me to be anywhere. Even Thailand.

But, not since I was 25 (and that was 25 years ago!) have I traveled for any length of time without it being for work. And the voice that still arises, even after all the acknowledgement and integration of it, is thankfully quite faint now but I can still hear it say: Who are you to take 3 weeks away? What will your clients think? You’re committing career suicide!

And I reply: I’m not abandoning anyone, especially not myself. I’m adding to my own experience and nurturing my relationship, which can only enhance my life, love and work. And, I’ve calculated how to still do my radio show and coaching group calls while I’m away – but not during the retreat, of course!

To tell you the truth, I’ve been doing deep work around this with my coach and my somatic trauma therapist. And I know that the more I continue to immerse myself in fully experiencing and inhabiting my own life, the better service I will be to others who are overcoming overachieving, perfectionism, fear of leisure, workaholism and the need to fill every moment to avoid feeling or dealing with what’s really here. I have been there. Trust me. That kind of compartmentalization and the glorification of busy are a few of the elements that allowed me to stay in my marriage for far too long.

And now, the gift here for me is that the part of me who just wants it to all be over so I can be back home with my creature comforts is fully open to being reminded – daily and lovingly – by the other part of me who longs to evolve to stay present with what is, to drink it all in and not miss a moment.

And I am able to acknowledge myself for everything I’ve done, for this life I’ve created, that makes this trip possible. As I fly, I embrace this unrecognizable self I’ve become – someone who can do this! – while willing to dive into the unknown trusting that no matter how I emerge, this experience can only be a game-changer pointing me toward positivity, empowerment, embodiment, expansion and a beacon for others.

Ready or not, it’s time to JUMP! Grab my FREE 10 Steps to Letting Go and Leaping, and Step One Jump! Audio to begin taking the steps toward your new life. Click here!

I promise to let you know how it all goes. Look for me on the other side, with Part 2!


Are You Addicted to Approval?



The truth is, most of us don’t know how to set and maintain good boundaries. We’ve been taught to put the needs of others ahead of our own. And the attachment many of us feel to keeping others happy is tenacious. Pleasing becomes our currency, the way we purchase love and attention.

Each time you set a healthy boundary, you say “yes” to more freedom.

In my experience, setting new boundaries means assessing each situation from the perspective of putting your own needs first. Too often we abandon ourselves for the sake of another. Setting healthy boundaries is about consciously choosing to honor yourself and no longer acting or reacting in response to someone else.

It’s time to stop putting your worthiness in the hands of others.

Setting new boundaries will allow you to move from a clean, clear place…your your own authentic motivation and agency.

Many of my coaching clients first enter into this conversation around boundaries with the fear of being seen as selfish, uncaring and irresponsible. They cite their relationships, children, finances or work obligations as excuses for not setting boundaries and taking care of themselves. Now let’s be clear, I’m not suggesting you turn your back on your obligations and responsibilities. In fact, it’s only possible to make choices and changes in the direction of your dreams and desires by making yourself a priority.

Just like speaking truth to ourselves, setting boundaries takes practice. As you set them, you may feel off balance, like you have a new pair of legs, and it can be challenging because the habit of trying to take care of everyone else is a very hard one to break.

Be gentle with yourself.

Keep reminding yourself that you’re ready to support you, instead of rescuing everyone else.

     •When we refuse to set a healthy boundary, we’re expressing and affirming the common core beliefs       that run our inner dialogue: I’m not enough, I’m not lovable, the needs and opinions of others are more important or valid than my own, If I disagree with someone or ask for what I want, I’ll end up alone and unloved, etc.

•These beliefs are either determined by a conclusion we’ve drawn about ourselves, or sometimes they’re inherited. They belong to someone else and we adopt them, allowing other people to take up valuable space in our heads. Wherever these beliefs come from, it’s time now to disengage from these voices to find your own.

Imagine giving yourself what you need internally, rather than hunting for it externally!

Imagine meeting your desire to cultivate more self-love and have more fun.

What if you placed pleasing yourself above pleasing others?

What if, instead of defaulting to your knee-jerk yes, you honored your own no today?

Setting one boundary will help you develop the courage to set more boundaries.

Remember, what matters most is that you approve of you!

Give yourself permission today to live your own life aligned with your truth and desires!  

I’ve got a gift to get you started. Click here for an awesome audio where I personally guide you through step one in my Jump! Coaching process and an eBook to walk you through my Ten Steps to Letting Go and Leaping, plus many other free goodies.


Can you love yourself more?

Love Yourself MoreI often talk about honoring the space between no longer and not yet, for it’s in this liminal space that resiliency and resourcefulness are born.

I spent much of last year self-resourcing. And finding resiliency in self-love. Awakening to myself first.

On February 25, 2014 – my 49th birthday – the man I had been seeing and I decided to part. We left each other, though still very much in love, because we wanted different things. Eight years younger than I and never married, he longed for a partner and playmate to share life with. And I, having left an enmeshed co-dependent marriage, was a workaholic, happily entrenched in my career and on the road for long stretches at a time. The truth is that I was either working or recovering. Love and play felt like items on my to-do list. Yet I believed I could juggle it all and give myself fully to everything. That belief ultimately stretched our relationship to its breaking point and sent me into 8 months of solid certainty that it’s far easier to be alone.

And it was.

During those 8 months I self-published my book Jump … And Your Life Will Appear which did so well during its initial release that Hay House offered me a deal to re-publish it. I traveled for speaking engagements and to be with family and friends. I often hiked for several hours a day. Woke up when I wanted to and went to bed when I wanted to. Ate what I wanted to. I watched what I wanted to when I wanted to. I firmly established my coaching business, allowing me to take the giant jump of leaving my day job.

Over that summer, friends of mine got married and their wedding was like the one at the end of every romantic movie, only times a billion. The gorgeous, joyous and madly in love couple exchanged vows pledging their hearts and souls to one another before friends and family against the backdrop of sunshine and waterfront. It was magnificent. Really and truly. And yet, as I sat there watching it was so crystal clear to me that I didn’t want what they were having.

Why on earth would I want that? I had no one to answer to and no one to take into account for decisions I was making. I was free from the obligation of relationship. And I could work as much as I wanted to! It was sheer bliss.

Until it wasn’t.

I started to long for fun and play of full moons, camping, road-trips, mountain biking and the yummy love that he infused our relationship with. The things I resisted for fear they threated my work at one time. It wasn’t about being lonely or wanting a boyfriend. It was about wanting him. Wanting us.

When my guy and I split he helped me load up all the stuff that was at his place in Aspen so I could drive everything back to my place Boulder. He even packed me a spare head for the electric toothbrushes we have.

Remember, we left each other in love.

Nearly 8 months had passed without any communication. He made that request and I was determined to honor it.

Historically, I’ve been really good at restrictive, righteous self-control and less good at following my heart.

And then, one sunny Saturday last October I took a risk.

Over the past few years along my journey to finding my own truth, my own voice and my own power, I’ve learned that when we stay inside the lines too rigidly, we stop the flow of allowing. Sometimes we need to burst the dam and let the pent up energy move so that new possibilities and options can emerge where before there was only stagnant, lifeless water.

It took me years to stop thinking I needed a permission slip. Years to know that my life was my own and that I didn’t owe it to anyone. Years to get free from believing the only way to be loved is by buying it, bending over backwards with people-pleasing. Years to know that everything we are seeking externally needs to be resolved internally first. Years to live life from my own inspiration, motivation and agency rather than in response or reaction to anyone or anything else. Years to know that our present moment choices can actually predict our future and that every choice we make today is either in service of the live we desire living into, or sabotaging it. Years to know that the answer to freedom is self-love, self-acceptance and self-forgiveness.

I took a risk and followed my heart. I was so consumed with breaking a boundary that I almost didn’t.

Here’s some of what I emailed:

i want to relinquish
the rigid stronghold
that’s keeping us apart
and let you know
i miss you in my life
i love you always
i am in love with you still

Here’s some of what he wrote back:

thank you for reaching out. i appreciate the risk you took in doing so. after writing and re-writing you for the past 2 hours – i don’t know what to say. it feels good to hear from you. i am crying.

Turns out, as fate would have it, he was in Boulder that weekend. Two days later we met for a walk and sat on a rock in the creek for four hours. It was as if everything and nothing had changed.

We have been together ever since.

We put closure on the past so that we can do it differently now.

It’s a tall order. Building on the good, facing fear, and allowing for expansion and possibility. To be independent and entwined, each successful in whatever way that means. To be all-in this loving relationship where we speak our truth and don’t get threatened or lose ourselves in love.

It’s a tall order, I know, but day-by-day we’re doing it.

Sometimes it’s glorious, sometimes it’s messy, sometimes unskilled, sometimes graceful. Always all-in, and that makes all the difference.

I no longer have one foot out the door. I’ve shifted the belief that being in relationship and being successful in my career are mutually exclusive. I will always love my work but I have a reverence for play now too, appreciating the ebb and flow of how one feeds the other.

And still, the bud of self-love that awakened in me blooms big, reminding me that while life might indeed be easier when alone, it’s much more fun when shared, and that I had to fall in love with myself first.

love 2.0
for aaron

i used to
feel small
and sinking

so afraid of
being swallowed

i feel your heart
reeling me in
above waterline
to breathe again

when i am submerged
i remember that
air is always available
in love with you


The more we love ourselves, the more capacity we have to love others.

How do you love yourself more?

Simply think of someone you love with all your heart, and imagine what it would feel like to turn that love back toward yourself.

Join the conversation with me on Facebook.

So, what is your one different choice?

Make One Different ChoiceMovement mobilizes possibility, and change begins with making a different choice. Take one powerful action today and everything will begin to shift and crack open.

Making one different choice for yourself can have an enormous impact as you move toward jumping into your new and better life.

When you do one thing differently, you dissolve a pattern and prove to yourself that there is life beyond the familiar. I’m not going to pretend that this is always a smooth process and that these changes happen overnight.

During the transition from leaving behind our old beliefs and creating new ones, we start to notice our patterns. For example, while the new beliefs are in the process of becoming “installed” to upgrade our operating system, we become more aware of when we misinterpret situations based on our old beliefs. We catch ourselves in the act of thinking and behaving in limited ways. Or we notice ourselves attracting a situation that’s similar to one we attracted in the past—and we make a conscious choice not to engage in the old pattern. This is how change happens, and how our beliefs cease to have power over us.

Remember not to beat yourself up for excuses that held you back in the past! We can’t turn back the clock, but we can start again right now.

Your present moment choices are the crystal ball that will predict your future.

This is the powerful truth, and it is the truth you can discover for yourself! Join the discussion with me on Facebook. 


immersing and emerging 

Immersing and emerging

geometry of ritual

if you get it right
there’s a chaos missing

a pose is found
in its unraveling

you may only catch
a glimpse
but progress is not
bending or reaching farther

growth resides in
recognizing enough
if you only concentrate on
touching the ground
you miss out on the limitless
grace of your experience

where you are today is only that
just because you touched your toe
in trikonasana yesterday and
do not today
does not mean

the integrity of the pose is
more important than
how far you can take it

twisting wringing drenching
reaching and releasing

skin tells the story of the body
holding the duality
in isometric force

the truth lies beyond opposites
structure  rhythm  intent

a body truly humbled
by the geometry of ritual

peace is found
when you accept vulnerability
and allow yourself to be seen
in all variations of one pose

Join the conversation with me on Facebook.

What is your inner knowing telling you?

What is your inner knowing telling you?When something is “off” in your life, you know it. And it takes an incredible amount of energy to continue the denial—energy that could be used toward letting go of the old and inviting in the new. That’s what I learned when things finally fell apart in my marriage. And, to my great delight, the new was so much better. If I had just been able to let go sooner, I could have started that new life years before.

We deceive ourselves in all sorts of ways. For so long, my self-worth was tied up in how much of a chameleon I could be. How much could I please people? How well could I turn myself into what they needed? Becoming what they wanted brought me the most validation, but it was a false validation. I was loved for my façade, not for me. When I finally let the façade go, I discovered that, yes, there were people in the world who would love me for my true self, even though I wasn’t perfect. I learned that I could not only survive if I was human, but actually thrive because of it. We are meant to be fully and truly who we are. If we’re living authentically, we might show different aspects of our personalities in different situations, but none of them will be false.

It’s impossible to maintain a false identity without consequences.

It takes a lot of energy to hold up a mask, to continue a story, to portray a role that isn’t true. When you stop and tell the truth, so much energy becomes available to you—energy that can be used to live the life you want.

Imagine what would be available to you—energy, time, insight, freedom, fun, etc.—if you let the mask fall and committed to just being you. What would it be like to be that transparent, genuine, and organic in your life? Can you imagine it?

While the fear of revealing yourself is natural, doing so unburdens you. It actually helps you overcome the fear of judgment. Why? Because we discover that people aren’t judging us nearly as harshly as we expect. In fact, in my experience, people rarely judge us harshly when we show vulnerability. The biggest issue is how much we judge ourselves.

What do you see could open up for you, what would be available to you, if you let your masks, roles, stories, and secrets fall and committed to just being you?

What energy, time, insight, freedom, or fun could you have more of or experience that you can’t experience right now?

What about you? What inner whispers have you been ignoring? Join the conversation with me on Facebook.

Whose life are you living?

Whose life are you living?So much of the time, we would rather stay small and imprisoned than face the uncertainty of becoming who we are meant to be. The resentment that comes with keeping our dreams under wraps may be a life sentence, but it’s also a known commodity. It’s within our comfort zone. In order to stay there, we have to slip into denial, numb out, and stuff down our real feelings and our true selves. What a high cost we pay for that so-called “comfort.”

By staying in my marriage, I wasn’t allowing the full expression of my life to emerge, and looking back, I realize that the marriage was another hiding place for me. As long as I stayed and propped him up, I could hide from what I truly wanted and from all I was capable of becoming. Leaving my husband meant I would no longer have excuses for not fully inhabiting my life—a terrifying thought.

I became aware that my denial had caused an underlying tension in almost everything I did, and tension is the opposite of freedom. In my career, people-pleasing and workaholism became escapes. I kept jumping through hoop after hoop in order to receive recognition and earn a gold star. But no amount of gold stars was ever enough to fill the emptiness of living an inauthentic life.

I have learned that betraying myself can never be the price I pay to avoid betraying someone else. We don’t serve anyone if we are pretending. We don’t owe anyone the denial of who we are.

Mine is not a solo story.

The majority of my coaching clients come to me with no idea of what they really want. They’re in some sort of transition knowing they need to make a change, yet facing the prospect of living life on their own terms aligned with their own desires for the first time is daunting.

Simply naming desires – feeling worthy and deserving of them without worrying about the logistics and implementation – is the portal into the process of healing, truth-telling and transformation.

* * *

For most of my life, I needed validation. I looked outward for permission. Permission to offer myself love and acceptance. I put everyone else’s dreams, needs, desires before mine. I spent my days managing the perceptions of others, projecting an image of perfection. In the process, I forgot something.

I forgot to live my own life. Marriage was a long time to be away from myself.

I didn’t feel loved for who I was—especially not in my marriage—so I believed I never would be. I checked out. Went to sleep. And was awakened only by an explosion of epic proportions.

After the dust settled, I had a choice. I could either stay numb and go back to sleep. Or, I could face my fears. I could embrace change. I could stop living my life in reaction to others. Own up to desire.

And so the journey began.

The journey to knowing, deep in my essence, that I am loved. No matter what I do or don’t do. Even if I don’t do anything I will be loved.

But how? I needed courage. I found it in my body.

My body—flesh and bone—a treasure chest. Its cellular secrets under lock and key until the moment they were ready to be freed. The thaw came that way: an instant, a window, an opening. If I’d left sooner, I would not have been able to stay away. If I’d stayed a moment longer, it would have been radical self-betrayal.

I remember leaving for the last time. I bought a clean, new mattress just days before, knowing it was a last offering to a lost time. I quietly told the truth to someone safe. There was the night I thought I heard him coming for me—first hope, then fear, then resignation. I remember finally asking for help. I remember when I didn’t think all the help was going to help. I remember when it finally did. I remember all the hours around the hours. Those hours building the skeleton of a leaving. Those hours of bone.

* * * 

I thought it was just about a marriage ending. But it was about so much more. Mourning the marriage, but also mourning the self I had been. Making room for the one I was becoming. That one—the new me—who could not go back. Who could not survive in such a dry climate.

Or could she? So much wanted to go back. How to hold that part of me? Simply hold it, and not act?

Uncertainty. The tension of opposites. How, just when we think we have landed, we are actually further unearthed. Ground must be restored, but not through stillness. Stillness will not satisfy. I discovered life as breath: fluidity is the only ground we can seek.

I remember the instant my marriage was over. Feeling like a failure for not fixing him. For not making the marriage work. For staying too long or not long enough. Waiting for him to sign the divorce papers. And also secretly wishing he would break down the door. Come back for me. How the jingling of any dog tags on any dog collar took my breath away. No idea that the last time I saw them would be the last time I saw them. Fun and happiness and pleasure were on hold indefinitely.

But then, a break. An unexpected encounter, a moment of awe. Sensation returning to my body. And there, my breath still held, I felt hunger for the first time.

And I cut my hair.

* * *

Florence, Italy. In Michaelangelo’s gallery, bodies birthing themselves from rough and ragged chunks of marble. “Unfinished Slaves,” frozen in a state of self-excavation. I, too, was carving myself back into life.

Shame and guilt stripped away, revealing my raw flesh. I reclaimed time lost; my unlived life. Forgiveness arrived, tentatively at first. Then—now—in bursts of disbelief. Inhabiting my life completely– no hiding, truly living – is unparalleled.

Once there was a marriage and now there is me.

What do I know, now? I know that happiness, fun, pleasure—these are the necessities. I know that loss is loss and grief is grief. I know that forgiveness is the gateway; freedom and love lie beyond. I know that nothing is better than living my life as it is happening. Meeting the miraculous moments as me—just me.

Just being me is the only thing I ever have to do to be loved.

I know that living on the other side of my greatest fear I can do anything.

Endings and beginnings are kickstarts and catalysts. An invitation to a life I never knew was possible: this extraordinary life I am living now.

And above all else I know that no matter what I do or don’t do, I am worthy.

I offer my heart to you with the hope that it serves as a compass to lead you back to yourself, with an invitation to find and trust your own voice as you dive deeply into your desire.

* * *

I wasn’t living my own life. Can you relate? Whose life are you living? Tell me about it on Facebook.

Risk… embrace it!

You’ll always be jumping—over and over and over.As you make your jump and learn to say yes more often, here’s an important truth to keep in mind: There is no destination. You’re never “there.” You’re always becoming. You’ll always be jumping—over and over and over. And that’s a good thing.

As so many opportunities came my way on the heels of both my big jumps and I thought to myself, “I must remember that it happens this way! If I let go, trust, and jump, I will be safe and showered with extraordinary surprises.”

Even though change can be challenging and painful at times, the risk has always been worth it!

At some point after your decision to leap into your new life, the foundation might begin to crack beneath you and crumble again. You will probably find yourself at the edge of an all-too-familiar cliff, terrified to jump, and struggling to remember that you were safe with ground growing below you, supporting your courage and willingness to change. When that happens, remind yourself of what happened when you jumped before.

Allow the wiser part of you to counsel the frightened part of you. Even if the transition was difficult, recall the many rewards that awaited you on the other side.

Regular small jumps followed by big leaps are a part of the package. In order to risk anything, we have to be willing to risk everything.

Of course, I realize that releasing your fears about jumping into the unknown is easier said than done. We want to know what we’re jumping to. We want an ironclad guarantee about the certainty of our decision to jump. But the truth is that opportunity and possibility are borne in the unknown and uncertainty.

The goal is not to arrive at a destination but to get to the point where your whole life is one big leap. Life is like a video game—the reward for winning one level is an even harder level. You simply become more comfortable with spontaneity, taking chances and the invitation to change.

Life is just a series of course corrections. If you are making choices and taking actions in alignment with your truth, there’s no wrong way to live your life.

So, begin to look for the jumps and what is waiting for you, what you can change and what you can say yes to.

One day soon you’ll begin to feel comfortable outside of your comfort zone and you’ll welcome the feeling of being slightly off balance because you enjoy the growth process.

Are you ready to embrace risk and learn to look for your next Jump? Join the conversation with me on Facebook.

Are you giving away your power?

More personal powerThere are many different ways we can consciously and unconsciously give away our power.

You may be handing your power over to your significant other, your family, your boss…or to a limiting belief that’s held you hostage since childhood. You might discover that you’ve given power away for years without realizing it. That’s because through the lens of low self-worth, we often stay blind to the places in our lives where we hand over our power. When the blinders finally come off, it can be downright shocking to discover how much we’ve tolerated over the course of our lives.

The more worthy we feel, the more we become aware of the injustice of powerlessness. Then, we simply refuse to allow anyone or anything else to take the reins to our life. We want what’s rightfully ours because we know, without question, that we deserve it.

I’ve seen many high-performance women who have “head in the sand syndrome.” They’re intimidated by their own desires, they talk themselves out of self-care, they procrastinate and put their worthiness in the hands of others. They stay when they really want to go.

We’re afraid of what we don’t know, so we hide. We’re afraid of what we might find out, so we hope it will all just go away.

Often, when we fear our power, what we’re really afraid of is taking responsibility.

When we don’t take responsibility for our own lives we put ourselves in a disempowered position of letting others make decisions for us. It might even feel like an even exchange to give away our power for safety, security, love. But that safety, security, love comes at a high price. It means we don’t have a say in what happens to us. We’re at the mercy of someone else. Only when we’re responsible for our own situation do we have the opportunity to make the necessary choices to change it.

We don’t allow anyone else to take from us what we don’t freely give.

Ask yourself:

  • What choice would feel most powerful to you?
  • What would a person with high self-worth do?
  • What’s the most self-empowering action you can take today?

There’s nothing powerful about not wanting to see reality. It’s time to develop the courage to look—powerfully—at the truth.

And it all begins with making one different choice. Today!

Are you ready to stop giving away your power? Join the conversation with me on Facebook.